why you're single

What To Say When Asked Why You’re Single Over the Holidays

Whether you’re going to visit family, or chatting with them on a video call, someone always asks why you’re still single during the holidays. While they’re usually well-meaning, it can be really difficult to handle.

These questions only add to the stress many singles feel this time of year. There’s so much emphasis placed on romance during the holidays which can result in feelings of loneliness. For many folks meeting up with family and old friends can even be kind of embarrassing, or worse, dreaded.

Negative feelings can also crop up when you’re single by choice. All it takes is one offhand remark before you start questioning every decision you’ve ever made. 

So, what can you do to handle the question and protect your well-being during the holidays?

What To Do When Family Members Ask Why You’re Single

Sometimes the best option is to avoid gatherings with judgemental. Instead, try to attend a different get-together where family or friends won’t be shaming.

If you’re obligated, and it bothers you, don’t be afraid to excuse yourself and cut it short. Try cooling off, then talking about your feelings with someone who is empathetic and supportive – like a single friend who understands what it’s like.

If you don’t plan on dating, explain that you’re happy being single, that it’s a choice, and then change the subject.

And remember, if you’re upset allow yourself to feel your feelings. Don’t shame yourself for having a tough time, needing a break, or even skipping the get-together or call. Many singles feel stressed and depressed during the holidays. So do whatever you need to do to feel OK.

How To Focus On Your Well-Being After The Holidays

If you found yourself in a difficult situation during the holidays, prioritize some self-care. Enjoy some mindful alone time, or speaking with close friends. Focus on things that make you happy. Listen to a favorite song, play with a pet, or volunteer to find positive distractions. It’ll all help you recharge and reset.

If you do want to date, consider waiting until the holidays are officially over. Being stressed and busy won’t make for the right headspace to assess what you want and need.

Once the new year is underway and you’re back in a good place, that’s when you can do what will help you meet new people. Just make sure you’re doing it for yourself, and not because your family made you feel guilty about being single.